If you *truly* love me, listen to my recent personal story.

[Adigun A. Polack]

Dearest all of the QB45/QB71 community,

HELLO TO YOU ALL ( ! ), and it is the *first* time in about more than a month that I have ever posted in this “General” section of these forums here.

Now, please listen real closely as I intimately and _literally_ share my personal story with you on how I dealt with one personal rejection after another that took place since this very year first began.

Ever since before the start of 2004, I suddenly had this vague, ridiculous fear of doing something wrong — BELIEVE IT OR NOT — even when I was trying to do something right, too! I mean, even from just this past weekend (the weekend of April 17, 2004) since my last post before this one on the QBasicNews.com forums, I literally felt like that if I have done something wrong (or when even any person tries to finds something to argue about on my post(s) and/or assumes that I have done something wrong, as well), then I tried to think that people don’t even love me anymore at all, which perhaps explained why I had to move a couple of sheets of paper apart quite slowly but surely to reveal what the words were on what some of them have said about my last post! And I felt that STUPID fear torment me and beat me over the head and saying to me that “you’re doing something wrong, Adigun, you’re a BIG failure” over, and over, and over, and over again and then plenty (and dearest God, I have suffered severely!)! But you know what, from just last night, I have had *FLAT-ENOUGH* of that fear that I just wanted to rip it plain apart. I mean, I was rather plain so angry ( :x ! ) at it, I had to get it out TOTALLY of my system and cast it completely down and out, rather instead of me being lead by those feelings period. In addition, I casted all of my anger over on the Lord, too! BOY, THAT ALL MADE ME SO FREE AND GOOD ALL OVER!! !! You know why? Because I just found out for myself personally that fear is sin. And why is fear sin? Because it already has torment just like that (snap!), all 100%. I am *not* even talking about any religious-based stuff at all, but rather, I am relating something to you wonderful ladies and gentlemen that is going to build you up in an enlightening and encouraging way! !!

You know something, people, speaking of which, I believe that one of the most senselessly stupidest mistakes that we can even make on our own, even in private, too — whether the head of the forums or otherwise — is to just simply act like we *do not* have any problems at all, and just “laa-de-da-de-da-de-da” our way, giving the other people NOTHING AT ALL to even relate to, ever. That is pure bull gone to seed, all because of that (it is like, :barf:, you know?)! Instead, I believe personally with ALL 100% of my heart, honesty, and boldness that we all need to relate to people and say, “Look, if you can make it, I can make it! I mean, if he/she can be a blessing to somebody in secret even while he/she has got some problems in my life (even if he/she does not feel like it period!), then I can be a DEFINITE blessing to somebody in secret even while he/she has got some problems in my life, whether I feel like it at all or not! If you can overcome your own personal problems, then I CAN OVERCOME MY OWN ONES AS WELL! !”, because then, that makes us *MUCH* better people towards others, and especially towards ourselves, also!! ^_^ ! If you don’t believe me, then why don’t you just start giving it a drive for yourself and see what happens. COME ON NOW, THIS COULD SAVE YOU A WHOLE LOT OF TURMOIL AND HEARTACHE IF YOU JUST FOLLOW THIS CAREFULLY!

I am not putting you down or anything to begin with. I am rather just pouring out my heart to you the *best possible* way that I know how in order to help you overcome some personal stuff you are going through, all because I love you all and I want to do all that I can to be a dead-serious blessing ON-PURPOSE to you all, to build you up, to help you confront and get real with yourselves and with other people.

See you later.



HELPING YOU OVERCOME SOME THINGS IN YOUR LIFE,

Adigun Azikiwe Polack
One of the Founders of “Aura Flow”
Continuing Developer of “Frantic Journey”
Current Developer of “Star Angelic Slugger”



P.S. Sure I do not *do* everything right the first time, and that I have even done some of the most point-blank GOOFIEST things that are like phhhhht ( ), you know? But you know what, I am learning to do something right and encouraging to bless you and help you out, like this post that you have just read. I *sure* hope that you learn from it and let it inspire you to do something good! ;*) !!




______________________________________
N E V E R • F O O L • W I T H • M Y • W R I T I N G .
It is my *well-known* trademark, so please learn to get used to it now.

[na_th_an]

If you become tolerant, people will tolerate you. It's that easy

[Bluffer]

I dealt with one personal rejection after another that took place since this very year first began.

Where are you beeing rejected at.. I don't reject you , I haven't seen anything you done wrong , no more than I ....May pease be with you 8)

[Z!re]

And could you please change your posting style?

I'm using the sub-silver theme, and your text is nearly unreadable.

Just a suggestion, no offense intended mate =)

[Zack]

And could you please change your posting style?

I'm using the sub-silver theme, and your text is nearly unreadable.

Just a suggestion, no offense intended mate =)

The trick is to highlight all the text of his post. It's ugly, but readable.

[Adigun A. Polack]

To Na_th_an and Bluffer:

Right up front, I have never even said that you both rejected me at all. I mean, come on, I love you guys as well, regardless of the past. So do relax and leave all your worries behind, you got me now? !

Instead, I believe personally with ALL 100% of my heart, honesty, and boldness that we all need to relate to people and say, “Look, if you can make it, I can make it! I mean, if he/she can be a blessing to somebody in secret even while he/she has got some problems in my life (even if he/she does not feel like it period!), then I can be a DEFINITE blessing to somebody in secret even while he/she has got some problems in my life, whether I feel like it at all or not! If you can overcome your own personal problems, then I CAN OVERCOME MY OWN ONES AS WELL! !”, because then, that makes us *MUCH* better people towards others, and especially towards ourselves, also!! ^_^ !

Oops, I *accidentally* wrote down the words “he/she has” (which was highlighted in pink). What I meant to say, actually, was “I have” — as if to say “I mean, if he/she can be a blessing to somebody in secret even while he/she has got some problems in my life (even if he/she does not feel like it period!), then I can be a DEFINITE blessing to somebody in secret even while I have got some problems in my life, whether I feel like it at all or not!”. Sorry for that minor little mistake.

If you become tolerant, people will tolerate you. It's that easy

Well man, that *is* most true in some to a lot of cases as the bare minimum amount that I can have. ! I mean, I do not expect to please just all people myself, but hey, I am learning to just get real myself and move on forward. I usually adjust and adapt to meet you and others where you are at in order to help you get from point A to point B and beyond, and that is what I will continue to do. DEFINITELY.

God bless you both, and thank you.



LETTING YOU KNOW,

Adigun Azikiwe Polack
One of the Founders of “Aura Flow”
Continuing Developer of “Frantic Journey”
Current Developer of “Star Angelic Slugger”



______________________________________
T H I S • N O W • I S • T H E • M A R K I N G • O F • M Y • 2 0 0 t h • P O S T ! ! !
Wow, is that my latest milestone here or what? NO RATHER KIDDING!! !!

[Bluffer]

[/quote]guys as well, regardless of the past.

there is no past here only future
8)

[adosorken]

If you become tolerant, people will tolerate you. It's that easy

I've been telling people this for years on end...