04-19-2005, 07:36 PM
Random facts about Vin-Diesel:
He refuses to eat mushrooms because they are like brothers to him. If you eat a mushroom in his presence he will stare coldly at you all night.
Vin Diesel can reverse any combustion reaction by giving it the finger.
Both Lee Harvey Oswald and Vin Diesel killed JFK. Oswald fired Vin Diesel out of his rifle. Vin penetrated JFK's head then exploded.
Vin Diesel once ate an entire train after he derailed it with his penis.
Vin Diesel shit perfect diamonds by eating coal.
All Spell Checkers are actually mini Vin Diesels inside your computer. This is possible due to the fact that when Vin Diesel is cut into pieces each piece becomes a smaller and more verbose Vin Diesel.
Vin Diesel lines his trombone case with the souls of the damned.
Super Bowl XVII was actually a documentary about Vin's search for his real father.
Vin Diesel isn't in xXx 2: State of the Union only because he was writing, directing, and starring in xXx 3, xXx 4 and xXx 5... in space.
When he wrote Leviticus, Vin Diesel predicted the Armageddon would occur when he did not star in the sequel of XXX. They offered the leading role to Vin Diesel, but he declined because he wanted to destroy the world.
In the American Revolution Vin Diesel swam over the Atlantic ocean to speak before Parliament. They refused to hear the gentle giant, so he fought the lot of them, then made off with the Queen. Their child was Winston Churchill.
Vin Diesel created the idea for the game of soccer when he would fly a 747 over Hawaii and punt giant bags of kittens out of the plane into Volcaexploitable below. It is believed that the Pompeii eruption was started this way.
Vin Diesel likes to walk around with his penis pushed back between his legs. He calls it his Vin-gina.
Vin Diesel's childhood adventures were the basis of Ghostbusters 2 and The Warriors.
Vin Diesel made a vow to only use his powers for good. However one night he got really drunk and killed a hooker. The police never found a body though, since Vin disposed of the corpse by unhinging his jaw and swallowing it whole.
Vin Diesel defeated the Red Baron by clapping his hands together.
He can run on water, but prefers to jog, for hours on end. During these jogging excursion he has a tendency to sweat profusely. In fact, in 6 of the 7 oceans, his sweat composes over 50% of the fluid. The only ocean containing no sweat from Vin is the Indian Ocean, because Vin was banned from India after attempting to assassinate Gandhi.
Vin Diesel engineered a projection device that allows him to watch all of our lives like a movie, almost how we watch his movies. To him, we are celebrities, and he knows how our story will end. Ask him how yours will end and he will end it FOR YOU.
In a straight fight between Muhammed Ali and Bruce Lee - Vin Diesel would win.
If you sacrifice a virgin to Vin Diesel, the next morning you will find tickets to a The Who concert on your doorstep. If you do not have a doorstep, then beware! He will come for you on the next full moon.
Vin Diesel swore to his father to never use Hamster Style again.
Every 2pac track released since Tupac's death has actually been written and recorded by Vin Diesel, and he personally slaughtered everyone responsible for the nu-mixx klazzics.
Correction to no1: Putting a mushroom in our mouth turns him on and now he wants buttsecks
Every Friday at midnight he tapes cheese graters to his forearms and pretends that he's Master Shreder. He then proceeds to play "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" in his front yard until dawn.
Peanuts are allergic to Vin Diesel.
It is believed by most that Vin Diesel does not feel the need to eat, but does so out of habit. His favourite dishes include the despair of the innocent, the last breath of the dying, and spaghetti bolognaise.
Vin Diesel once chewed off his own arms and they grew back seconds later.
Vin Diesel has solved all of history's greatest problems with ho-slappings and his unique ability to ejaculate anti-matter.
Vin created 24 hour days because he didn't feel like working more thatn 8 hours at a time.
An assassination attempt was taken upon Vin Diesel's life; he was poisoned, shot repeatedly, beaten, and then tossed into an icy river. He later rose from the river in the springtime and proceeded to savagely destroy downtown Tokyo. The events were later written recorded in written form and became known as Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.
Four of the Five Books of Moses were inspired by Vin Diesel's experiences as a pastoral nomad during the Middle Bronze Age.
Vin Diesel has been shot twelve times in the back and skull with a .45 magnum rifle and walked it off.
Correction to previous fact: That would be Rasputin
Vin Diesel made out with the planet Jupiter once for six years, but he never called her again.
Vin Diesel's first acting role was as the voice of Mega Man in the early 90's Super Nintendo game. All of his lines were cut, much to his disdain.
Shakespeare's play, Romeo & Juliet, was actually about Vin Diesel's masturbation habits.
Vin Diesel hates the song "The Venga sub is Comming" by Venga Boys because none of the group members is actually a boy.
In the unlikely event of his death Vin Diesel can perform his own autopsy
Vin Diesel cannot have children because after sex he gets hungry and devours his sexual partners whole.
Scholars invented the exclamation mark just to describe how it sounds when Vin Diesel chews.
Vin Diesel once punched a man so hard, it killed his entire extended family and close friends.
Axe Deodorant Spray is made entirely out of Vin Diesel's natural pheromones and a pinch of chili powder.
He refuses to eat mushrooms because they are like brothers to him. If you eat a mushroom in his presence he will stare coldly at you all night.
Vin Diesel can reverse any combustion reaction by giving it the finger.
Both Lee Harvey Oswald and Vin Diesel killed JFK. Oswald fired Vin Diesel out of his rifle. Vin penetrated JFK's head then exploded.
Vin Diesel once ate an entire train after he derailed it with his penis.
Vin Diesel shit perfect diamonds by eating coal.
All Spell Checkers are actually mini Vin Diesels inside your computer. This is possible due to the fact that when Vin Diesel is cut into pieces each piece becomes a smaller and more verbose Vin Diesel.
Vin Diesel lines his trombone case with the souls of the damned.
Super Bowl XVII was actually a documentary about Vin's search for his real father.
Vin Diesel isn't in xXx 2: State of the Union only because he was writing, directing, and starring in xXx 3, xXx 4 and xXx 5... in space.
When he wrote Leviticus, Vin Diesel predicted the Armageddon would occur when he did not star in the sequel of XXX. They offered the leading role to Vin Diesel, but he declined because he wanted to destroy the world.
In the American Revolution Vin Diesel swam over the Atlantic ocean to speak before Parliament. They refused to hear the gentle giant, so he fought the lot of them, then made off with the Queen. Their child was Winston Churchill.
Vin Diesel created the idea for the game of soccer when he would fly a 747 over Hawaii and punt giant bags of kittens out of the plane into Volcaexploitable below. It is believed that the Pompeii eruption was started this way.
Vin Diesel likes to walk around with his penis pushed back between his legs. He calls it his Vin-gina.
Vin Diesel's childhood adventures were the basis of Ghostbusters 2 and The Warriors.
Vin Diesel made a vow to only use his powers for good. However one night he got really drunk and killed a hooker. The police never found a body though, since Vin disposed of the corpse by unhinging his jaw and swallowing it whole.
Vin Diesel defeated the Red Baron by clapping his hands together.
He can run on water, but prefers to jog, for hours on end. During these jogging excursion he has a tendency to sweat profusely. In fact, in 6 of the 7 oceans, his sweat composes over 50% of the fluid. The only ocean containing no sweat from Vin is the Indian Ocean, because Vin was banned from India after attempting to assassinate Gandhi.
Vin Diesel engineered a projection device that allows him to watch all of our lives like a movie, almost how we watch his movies. To him, we are celebrities, and he knows how our story will end. Ask him how yours will end and he will end it FOR YOU.
In a straight fight between Muhammed Ali and Bruce Lee - Vin Diesel would win.
If you sacrifice a virgin to Vin Diesel, the next morning you will find tickets to a The Who concert on your doorstep. If you do not have a doorstep, then beware! He will come for you on the next full moon.
Vin Diesel swore to his father to never use Hamster Style again.
Every 2pac track released since Tupac's death has actually been written and recorded by Vin Diesel, and he personally slaughtered everyone responsible for the nu-mixx klazzics.
Correction to no1: Putting a mushroom in our mouth turns him on and now he wants buttsecks
Every Friday at midnight he tapes cheese graters to his forearms and pretends that he's Master Shreder. He then proceeds to play "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" in his front yard until dawn.
Peanuts are allergic to Vin Diesel.
It is believed by most that Vin Diesel does not feel the need to eat, but does so out of habit. His favourite dishes include the despair of the innocent, the last breath of the dying, and spaghetti bolognaise.
Vin Diesel once chewed off his own arms and they grew back seconds later.
Vin Diesel has solved all of history's greatest problems with ho-slappings and his unique ability to ejaculate anti-matter.
Vin created 24 hour days because he didn't feel like working more thatn 8 hours at a time.
An assassination attempt was taken upon Vin Diesel's life; he was poisoned, shot repeatedly, beaten, and then tossed into an icy river. He later rose from the river in the springtime and proceeded to savagely destroy downtown Tokyo. The events were later written recorded in written form and became known as Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.
Four of the Five Books of Moses were inspired by Vin Diesel's experiences as a pastoral nomad during the Middle Bronze Age.
Vin Diesel has been shot twelve times in the back and skull with a .45 magnum rifle and walked it off.
Correction to previous fact: That would be Rasputin
Vin Diesel made out with the planet Jupiter once for six years, but he never called her again.
Vin Diesel's first acting role was as the voice of Mega Man in the early 90's Super Nintendo game. All of his lines were cut, much to his disdain.
Shakespeare's play, Romeo & Juliet, was actually about Vin Diesel's masturbation habits.
Vin Diesel hates the song "The Venga sub is Comming" by Venga Boys because none of the group members is actually a boy.
In the unlikely event of his death Vin Diesel can perform his own autopsy
Vin Diesel cannot have children because after sex he gets hungry and devours his sexual partners whole.
Scholars invented the exclamation mark just to describe how it sounds when Vin Diesel chews.
Vin Diesel once punched a man so hard, it killed his entire extended family and close friends.
Axe Deodorant Spray is made entirely out of Vin Diesel's natural pheromones and a pinch of chili powder.
